Posted by: mamaamy | March 13, 2008

Training To Sit During Fellowship

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Hello, I said I would write again, so here it is. I realized that on Wed, our babysitters are at the building (church). R on the way home jokingly said, “It might seem ironic, but if we have to, we can send the kids to church.” It does seem pretty ironic to me. Amy, I’ve been searching for something that we as a family can do and be spiritually where I’m not just taking the kids and leaving dad at home. It feels weird to me to have mom and dad fellowship without the kids though. Although at night it’s tougher with bedtime (tonight A was still awake when we got home anyway.) I have a desire to bring them, although G is at a tough age. I’m just a little torn because I want to teach them and have them with us. Any words?

T 🙂

Amy Cowart wrote:

I am so glad you were able to come. It is a blessing to have R interested…we have really been praying that the Lord would draw those here who are suppose to come. I feel that He is drawing R. He wants to offer R something real. If we can be the vehicles by which the Lord presents Himself to R, then praise God. About the kids…Here’s what I think. Many times in the past, we have taken our kids to fellowship. We were able to do this for several reasons. One, we trained the older (3+) to sit quietly. We did this by having story times in the evenings and requiring that they sit quietly during that time, if they misbehaved then they were put to bed and not allowed to get back up and we finished the story with out them so that they did indeed miss out on something. They quickly learned to sit quietly. We are in the process of training Moriah to follow suit. Sometimes, she talks or wiggles too much during story time and she is sent to bed before the other ones and she knows it is training and she doesn’t like it. So we have to continue the training, by requiring her to cry quietly and stay in bed. Second, when we had a baby that was nursed to sleep and we went somewhere for fellowship, I just left the main room, and went to a bedroom with the nursing one and helped them get to sleep, then just transferred them to the car. Sometimes I fell asleep too, sometimes I missed the whole meeting, but it was only for a season and I trusted that God would teach me what I needed to hear through my husband, or that my husband got what he needed at least.

We are willing to walk with you through this training with your children and if you feel that you want to bring them to have them with you, then please do. We are open. We just want it to be an environment where people can relax and are not disturbed by the kids. We also didn’t feel that we wanted to have to entertain kids. So it is really a matter of what you feel is best. If you want a break from having to attend to them and just come and relax, that’s great, if you want to bring them and have them learn to sit quietly with you, that’s great too. We also have the guest room available if you need to lay the baby down or lie down with a baby. How does this sound to you?

I think that we will keep it on Wed. because we have two Thurs. coming up that either Mitch or I will be out of town, but we will be in town on the Weds. You could come and leave a little early so he could get to his game? Let me know if that would work. Thanks again. Love,


Yes, thank you! I always used service to train .

With G, it was a bit more “hit and miss” because I had 2 there with just me, so I did bit more in the nursery with them. R last night talked about changing our bedtime routine a bit and I have been interested in trying a bit more what you do with the story time with everyone. Right now, I take G and A goes with R. That started this summer as a result of R finally having a regular schedule with work, so it was better than me doing both kids. Now that G is older though, we can change a bit again. If we start doing that more and Ryan gets to help with the quiet training instead of just me at “church”, AND if R wants the kids to come, we may do that eventually. He was once again impressed by how “disciplined” as he put it, your kids were, and I think that motivated him. I’ve never let my kids go to the “entertaining kid’s church” because I never wanted them to be entertained, or to have God be hyped up. So, if we brought them, it would be with the full understanding that they would be quiet and right with us.

A has always gotten physically excited when around other people not in our family, or just with other children. I can visibly see the physical change in him the minute (literally) that guests leave the house. When they are here, he goes back and forth between bouncing and being distracted vs. listening to my words. The minute they leave and it’s just us again, he goes right back to normal. I don’t know if it’s just we haven’t been around people as much or what, so that is something I’m working on too. It’s pretty easy with him to tell when he’s excited he jumps up and down in place. 🙂 (Like I used to, and still do sometimes.)

After I wrote the email I realized that R leaves about 9 for his games and it doesn’t take us that long to get home, so we can just leave a little early the days he has a game. Wed works. We’ll see you next week.

Thank you so much for your openness to God and us!

T 🙂


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